Eliminating the Attachment of Fear While Clarifying the Truth
Goh Siew Geok - Muar, Johor
Good day to our most honourable Master and fellow practitioners. My name is Goh Siew Geok from Muar, Johor. I obtained the Fa in mid July 2003 through a Chinese doctor who is a good friend of mine, at the time I had been pregnant for more than 7 months. Seeing my friend who has been practicing Qigong for more than 20 years and has reached quite a high level in Qi, letting go of his original practice and turned to concentrate on Falun Gong, in my mind I deduced this must be a very good practice. As there was no practice site in Muar, then, I had to practice alone at home. I finally have my copy of Zhuan Falun after some difficulties. The first time I read it. It touched my heart deeply. This is the Fa that I have been searching. So no matter how busy I am, I will always read Zhuan Falun for ten minutes to half an hour. I am unable to sleep if I do not read. In a short span of two months, I have read Zhuan Falun three times.
Last December, I had a dream. In the dream, I saw shiny gold colour everywhere and there were spinning Falun everywhere. The scene is just like what Master described in “Falun Paradise” in Hong Ying, “So dazzling are the tens of thousands of beautiful colour rays”. But at that time, I did not know what this dream was trying to tell me.
After liaising with a Johor Baru practitioner in May, a practice site is finally established in Muar, and we had our first group practice. Every Sunday morning, after practising the exercises, we study the Fa together and share our experiences. Johor Baru practitioners have been practising and studying together with us for a period of time. Therefore, I was able to obtain other Dafa books and Master’s latest articles. I spend between half to one hour daily to study the Fa. I always carry Dafa books with me so that I can read them during my spare time.
After a month and a half, I have completely read all Dafa books and Master’s new lectures. There were tribulations amidst this period such as my husband suddenly lost his job and I experienced elimination of karma physically. But, I did not pay much attention to them. One day, when I came home from work, I was getting off from my car. The sight in front of me seemed to shake suddenly and it looked like all particles in the dimension are experiencing changes. I felt as if I have entered into another dimension although the sight in front of me was still the same. From then on, I have a deeper understanding each time I studied the Dafa books.
All of Master’s lectures on Fa-rectification have mentioned the three things that Dafa disciples ought to do which are clarify the truth, study the Fa and send forth righteous thoughts. I have no problem with the latter two things. As for clarifying the truth, I still have doubts about it. Other practitioners have been encouraging me. During this period, I had a dream. In the dream, I was doing hong-Fa to the people around me but the results were not good. Feeling discouraged, I walked on the streets with a Zhuan Falun in my hand. Suddenly, I saw Master with a few disciples passing by in an unhurried manner. People on the roadsides were curious and they watched admiringly.
I realised that it is time for me to let go of my attachment of fear after sharing this dream with other fellow practitioners. Hence, I started to clarify the truth to my friends, relatives and customers. It was difficult in the beginning but after doing it for several times. I let go of the attachment of fear and my worries, which included embarrassment, and complain to my boss. Through continuously sending forth righteous thoughts, studying the Fa and clarifying the truth, I am able to let go of even more of my attachment to fear.
The negative and untrue published by our local newspapers have deeply deceived a lot of people. They have created a lot of misunderstandings towards Dafa. Clarifying the truth to my friends and people that I know is not too difficult because they would still listen to me without any emotion.
Then, I have always wanted to clarify the truth in tourist spots in Malacca when I heard that there are practitioners there daily. However, I still have not started due to my attachment to my daughter and fear of clarifying the truth to Chinese tourists.
Finally, when I saw Master’s article, “Let go of human attachments and save the world’s people”, I realised that there is not much time left. Every Dafa disciple should make full use of the time to save the world’s people. I went to a tourist spot in Malacca and sent forth righteous thoughts and clarified the truth to Chinese tourists.
Initially, my heart beat very fast and my nervousness had added some difficulties to it. I always search within myself where have I not done well when I got home from clarifying the truth. From there, I have a better understanding of why Master wanted us to go out and clarify the truth. Other than saving sentient beings, the entire process of clarifying the truth is at the same time eliminating our attachments layer by layer, and testing our own understanding and determination in Dafa.
Indirectly, this has encouraged me to do better next time and study the Fa more, to save more sentient beings. At a tourist spot, we would occasionally meet with some tour guides who have misunderstood Dafa and forbids the Chinese tourists from taking our truth-clarification materials. And even though some tourists would say disrespectful words, we would still smile at them and tell them the truth compassionately. However, we have also met with some tourists who eagerly wanted to know the truth. Sometimes, I would feel anxious while sending forth righteous thoughts and clarifying truth to Chinese tourists. I know that it is a test for me to pass. I think it is because of some attachments that I haven’t yet let go.
Lately, I spent a few nights to correct the words in Zhuan Falun as required. The more I amend them, the more energetic I became. I have continuously amended the words for four copies of Zhuan Falun. One night, as a result of being too energetic from the amendment of the words, I could not sleep no matter how I tried. I thought to myself, “If I still could not get some sleep, I will get up and practice the exercises.” When I was about to close my eyes, I saw Master. Then, I felt energy rushing upwards as if there is a big Falun rotating above my head, as fast as a spinning typhoon. I felt very relaxed but I was a little bit afraid. Then the rotation started to slow down. I immediately said to myself, “I am a Dafa disciple. There’s nothing to be afraid.” With this thought, the rotation became faster and this has continued for about 30 seconds and I finally fell asleep. Though I woke up very early the next day, I did not feel tired at all.
After reading Master’s lectures which were given in various countries, I was surprised to know that in China, in such a complex environment, everyone has persisted to practice at 4a.m. and 6p.m. After practice, they would study the Fa and this has been their daily routine. I was guilt-stricken because I slept too much and I was too comfortable. Some of them are farmers who have worked hard during the day but they still persisted in practicing twice daily and studying the Fa at night. I only cared for my own enjoyment. I know that there is limited time for cultivation during Fa-rectification period, and yet I still did not cultivate diligently. Therefore, as from August, I got up to practice at 5a.m. daily. It was not easy in the beginning but it has become a habit now. I feel refreshed although I only sleep for only five hours. There are still test from time to time.
My job requires me to drive a lot. Therefore, while driving, I recite Hong Ying instead of listening to the radio. After reciting five or six poems, I would feel sleepy and unable to continue. After awhile, I feel that it is quite easy to recite them. Each time when I recited “Plum” from Hong Yin II, I was moved to tears. I manage to obtain a copy of Hong Yin II after some time.
I read Hong Yin and Hong Yin II within a month. It has improved my understanding on Dafa. Since then, I emphasized even more on putting Dafa as number one. Now, I go to the tourist spot in Malacca two or three times a week to clarify the truth to the Chinese tourists. Other than practising the exercises at a park in Muar, every Sunday morning, I also practiced with another fellow practitioner every Saturday and clarified the truth to local residents.
The park is quite crowded. Many people noticed us after they have seen us practising there weekly. Most of them have seen our truth-clarification materials. Previously their misunderstandings of Dafa as political and that Dafa is against China. Now, they understand Dafa, and they even greet us upon seeing us.
Sometimes, we encounter with some who has predestined relationship to obtain the Fa. I think that it is due to our sending forth righteous thoughts every time before we start the practice. It has a certain effect on eliminating the interference that comes from the surrounding area. I can feel the energy of sending forth righteous thoughts becoming stronger and stronger. From this, I enlightened that by practising and the methods that we choose to clarify to local people are extremely important. The existence of a practice site does have a righteous effect towards everyday people.
The last four phrases from Master’s poem, entitled “Plum”-“Not getting lost in worldly attachments, steadfast righteous thoughts, since old age till now, it’s all because of this” (unofficial translation). Helped me in my understanding and has made me grab hold of time to cultivate more diligently, do better in clarifying the truth and sending forth righteous thoughts. I utilised most of my time daily to do Dafa-related work which included reciting Lunyu and Falun Dafa Hao when I’m with my children every morning.
I also enlightened that doing truth clarification work for cultivation. I can understand why can quickly improve my understanding on Dafa and this indeed is good Master has required Dafa disciples to step forward and clarify the truth. I treat all my everyday life and Dafa matters, be it bad or good incidents as tribulations for me to pass. Each time a problem surfaces, I will always look inward, occasionally reminding myself with Master’s words from Falun Dafa Essentials for Further Advancement, “A Cultivator Is Naturally Part of It.”
The above is my past five months of cultivation experienced, please point out if there is anything inappropriate. Finally, I would like to conclude with a part from Master’s poem from Hong Yin II, “Plum”- “Steadfast righteous thoughts. Since old age till now, it’s all because of this” (unofficial translation). I hope that everyone will not let go of this most precious and hard to come by opportunity. Thank you.